Red Robed Wizard

by Crown-Keeper

To the tune of 'Pinball Wizard,' with apologies to The Who.

Ever since I was a wizard
I used the magic ball
From Solamnia to Silvanesti
I must have seen them all
But I ain't seen nothing like him
In any Mages' Hall

That Red Robed Wizard
Sure uses illusions n' all

He makes imaginary statues
Casts like a machine
Uses all components
Always says words clean
He memorizes to fruition
The enemies all fall

That Red Robed Wizard
Sure uses illusions n' all

He's a Red Robed Wizard
There has to be a lich
Red Robed Wizard's got such a soulforged wrist

How do you think he casts them?
I don't know
What makes him so good?

He ain't got no conflicts
Isn't good or evil
Can't see no black or white
Wears the good old red
Always uses fireball
Never see it fail

That Reb Robed Wizard
Sure uses illusions n' all

I thought I was
The Mighty Conclave Head
But I just handed my Conclave crown to him

Even with my favorite tele
He can beat me there
His disciples give him guano
And he just does the rest
He's got crazy golden fingers
Though that cough might make him fall

That Reb Robed Wizard
Sure uses illusions n' all

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